When art influences real-life actions

The police described it as “extremely unusual” and they are not far wrong. Jason Moore, a 37-year old horror movie fan from England, was jailed for life for attacking his friend using a home-made Freddie Krueger-style glove (left). His defence lawyer accepted that Moore was “a dangerous man” who is “a very damaged individual”. Judge Michael Pert said: “”You are obsessed in particular with the Freddy Krueger figure in Nightmare on Elm Street.”

It seems absolutely crazy that someone would be so obsessed with a film as to do something like that. Where does it end?

A man obsessed with “The Fly” horror movie has been jailed for life for turning his friend in to a half-insect. Alan Bee, who built a machine consisting of two pods he claimed were able to transport matter, was “a bit mental” according to defending counsel Danny Longlegs.

Mr Bee told his friend Colin “Cock” Roach that the large pod device was a toilet that he could use before locking Mr Roach inside. In a scene that coincidentally followed the storyline of the movie, Mr Bee attempted to transport Mr Roach from one pod to another using the device control panel. Unfortunately for Mr Roach his DNA was mixed with the DNA of a fly who was trapped in the second pod.

Speaking from the witness box the hideous looking, wing-and-hair-laden Mr Roach said: “My life has been turned upside down – sometimes literally when I’m on the ceiling. I have also developed an irrational fear of rolled-up newspapers and spend far too much time in the garden.”

A man who is convinced he is a spirit and therefore should be allowed to enter ladies toilets and changing rooms, has been jailed for 30 days. 69-year old Frank Lee Speaking of Omahoa, Nebraska, denied charges of indeceny claiming that he died in the American Civil War in 1865 and has been roaming the earth for over 140 years.

His solicitor, somehow managing to keep a straight face, said that Mr Speaking claimed that the only person who could communicate with him was a 10 year old boy with no friends, reminiscent of the Bruce Willis movie “The Sixth Sense” where Haley Joel Osment’s character claims that he “sees dead people”.

Despite his seeming non-existence Mr Speaking is a member of his local DVD store where he has rented “The Sixth Sense” 25 times since October 2006.

“I am jailing you for 30 days,” declared Judge Ouchthat Hurt. “But given your status as a spirit I expect that you will just walk through the bars after 30 seconds.”

A 45-year old movie fan from London has been sent to a psychiatric unit after claiming he had travelled from the future to save mankind.

The man, who had his name legally changed to T800 twelve months ago, admitted that he might “need some help” in court today.

Some of his strange antics involved walking in to a bar naked and requesting a biker give his clothes to him, telling a 12 year old trumpet player from Croydon that he was the future leader of the resistance and hijacking a helicopter at a local airfield before admitting to the bemused pilot that he “didn’t know how to start it without the keys”.

“You have clearly lost sight of reality,” said Judge Peace N Quiet. “It is in your best interests that you spend some time under psychiatric evaluation.” When asked if he had anything to say, the prosecuted replied: “I’ll be back.”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s